It’s a Timing Thing

Maybe it’s because God is timeless, so the restrictions of days and months and years don’t really apply to Him, but I’ve always felt like God can be slow in His answers. Really slow. Like, I asked Him a question four months ago and He just now decided to grace me with an answer.

I’m not complaining, because the answer was actually quite timely and maybe I didn’t need to know four months ago. Maybe I only needed the answer when it finally came to me. Maybe God has better timing than I ever gave Him credit for. And maybe He’s sitting up there in heaven saying, “You mean you only figured that out just now?” (Because, as it turns out, God is not the only slow one in this relationship.)

I find it amazing that, while God is not bound by time, timing is such an important part of His work in our lives. God doesn’t always give answers on the day we ask questions because we may not need the answers until a little more time has passed—be it four days, four months, or four years.

And it’s like I’ll never learn that God has the answers all wrapped up for me as He awaits the perfect timing to hand me the gift of knowing. It’s like I’ll never be content to wait for His timing even though I’ve learned His timing is always perfect.

Because sometimes I just want an answer.

Whether or not I truly need the answer in that moment, I’d prefer not to endure four months of silence. And wouldn’t it make sense for me to simply store the answer in the back of my mind until the day I really need it? Why am I left with the questions and never the answers?

I think sometimes God must laugh at my ignorance, and not in a mocking way. Not in a way that makes Him roll His eyes and sigh in frustration because I still don’t understand. No, I think God must look at me the way I look at my preschoolers when they try to explain the mysteries of life. When they come up with a story that is so outrageous to those who know the truth, yet makes perfect sense in the naive logic of their minds. Yes, I think God smiles at me like I smile at them, knowing that one day I’ll know the truth and my childish imaginings will seem so silly even to me.

And though I know this, I keep coming up with my own explanations to questions that are yet to be answered.

I forget that it’s a timing thing.

I forget that the answers are on a need-to-know basis and I do not yet need to know.

And sometimes I get discouraged. And sometimes I forget…

God’s timing is so much better than mine. God’s timing is, in fact, perfect.

And maybe it’s okay that my questions remain unanswered for now, because the answers will be there when I need them most.

It's a Timing Thing

Two Dreams; One Life

“If there’s one thing I’ve always believed, it’s that you can’t let a relationship get in the way of your dreams.”

“But what if you have two dreams, and they both happen to be right in the same place at the same time?”

“Well, then I’d say you are a seriously lucky guy.”

So, I knew that I was enjoying Kate Brian’s modern-day telling of The Princess and The Pauper, but that scene made the book for me. Finally, a novel that puts romance where it’s supposed to be. She’s right, you know. It’s always a bad idea to let a relationship get in the way of your dreams. What I’m waiting for (and what I would encourage you to wait for) is the day that my two dreams just happen to be in the same place at the same time.

You see, you only have one life to live, but if you’re anything like me, you probably have more than one dream in that pretty, little head of yours. And it’s hard ~ it’s so, incredibly hard ~ to figure out which one you want to spend your life pursuing. But the thing is… it is possible to accomplish more than one dream, if you go about it the right way. Which leads us back to that “which-dream-do-I-want-to-chase-first” dilemma.

Here’s my opinion: Not Prince Charming.

Wait, wait, wait. Don’t get all discouraged and click that little red “x” in the corner of your screen. I’m merely trying to say that the marriage dream is a little harder to force. In fact, forcing that dream is a really bad idea, as it generally only leads to heartache. As much as we hate to admit it, we have no control over Prince Charming’s timing. (I mean, look at Sleeping Beauty ~ she had to wait one hundred years.) The thing is, it takes two people to fulfill that dream, so until your future husband shows up and offers some help in that department, I recommend pursuing the one you can accomplish on your own.

Neither dream is worth sacrificing for the other. The right guy is going to support your other dreams. So live in your first calling until the moment you look up and realize that both of your dreams happen to be right in the same place at the same time. Trust me, God’s cool enough to make that happen.

Perfect Timing

Ever have something come at just the right time? Life is starting to become overwhelming and you’ve had just about all you can take, then a friend brings you flowers to brighten your day. You’ve been wishing that God was real enough to hug you, then He sends someone else to hug you in His place. You’re starting to think that maybe God has abandoned you altogether,  then you flip open your Bible and read a passage that speaks directly into your situation. I’m used to being the recipient of God’s little blessings, but I’m absolutely floored when He chooses to use me to be that for someone else.

My last post wasn’t supposed to go out until today. I knew that I would be super busy over the weekend, so I tried  to schedule a post ahead of time. But I accidentally hit “publish”. And once you hit “publish”, there is no getting a post back. At first I was irritated. That post was supposed to buy me some time so I could rest after a crazy weekend. But then I got a report that made me realize that blog was posted in perfect timing. The reason the post published against my will was because it wasn’t a message meant for Monday; it was needed Friday. Had I waited until today to post it, it may have been too late. And someone else may have had a weekend that was even crazier than mine was.

Isn’t it funny how the little things that don’t make sense to us can also be the big things that mean the world to someone else? And isn’t it wonderful that God can take our mistakes and use them as a blessing in someone else’s life?

“And now at just the right time he has revealed this message, which we announce to everyone. It is by the command of God our Savior that I have been entrusted with this work for him.” -Titus 1:3

What’s the Rush?

I want to know what the world has against being single. I honestly want to know why it seems like everywhere I turn, someone is encouraging me to get married. Why is it that people look at you as if you are somewhat less of a person because you don’t have a spouse? What’s wrong with being single? Why is there such a big push to get married? Don’t get me wrong. I definitely want to be married someday. I simply don’t understand why people act as if I have to get married right now.  

William Booth wrote: “Don’t instill, or allow anybody else to instill into the hearts of your girls the idea that marriage is the chief end of life. If you do, don’t be surprised if they get engaged to the first empty, useless fool they come across.”

William Booth died in 1912 and I guess his words died with him because this is exactly what I see in our society today. It would appear that people think the purpose of a single girl is to find a husband. The single girls feel this way because the rest of the world is all too eager to play the matchmaker. And because of this mentality that has been instilled in our hearts, we are settling far too easily.

I’ve seen many girls give their hearts away to “empty, useless fools.” Somehow, they don’t see that the man is, indeed, a fool. You know the old saying, “Love is blind”? I think the more proper wording would be “Desire is denial.” We’re willing to overlook serious character flaws simply because we so badly want something to work out. I think that accounts for the ridiculously high divorce rate in our country. Denial only lasts for so long. There comes a day when you tire of lying to yourself. And instead of living with their mistake, most people call it quits.

So ladies, don’t let anyone instill in your hearts that marriage is the chief end of life. This isn’t a race to marry before “so-and-so” does. There’s no rush to find Mr. Right. Our season of singleness is meant for so much more than finding a future husband. I’d love to be able to tell you what that purpose is, but the details are something only God knows. Your purpose will be different from mine. Our callings may vary greatly. But you are called to something in this moment. Right now. Please don’t miss that calling because you’re too busy looking for a guy. Mr. Right will come in God’s perfect timing. You must first fulfill the purpose God has for you right now.

A Time To…

I think the one thing that is most harmful to single women who hope to be married one day is that horrible word called “timing.” We rush into unhealthy relationships because we don’t want to wait, or because we think we are ready, when in truth, we are not. I’ve come to learn that even good things can be bad things when done in the wrong timing.

I recently finished the book Lies Young Women Believe by Nancy Leigh DeMoss and Dannah Gresh. Aside from revealing some hurtful lies in a candid, compassionate manner, this book made me question something I had never really thought about before. Nancy and Dannah surmised that the tree that caused mankind’s downfall was probably meant for good… if Adam and Eve would have waited for God’s timing to enjoy the fruit. But they didn’t wait. And instead of enjoying the blessing that could have been, mankind was faced with a terrible curse. That my friend, is what is happening to us. We’re rushing ahead of God’s timing and turning relationships (which are a good thing) into a bad thing.

Ecclesiastes chapter 3 tells us that there is a time for everything - a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot, a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build, a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance… and so on. There is a time to be in a relationship and there is a time to embrace singleness. Don’t rush God’s timing. Don’t think that He is wrong. It may just be that He has a blessing beyond imagination waiting just around the corner. One day it will be time to dance with your husband, but until that day, enjoy the freedom of dancing to your own rhythm.

No matter what else may be eluding your grasp, there is one thing that never goes out of season… Now is the time to live.