Have you ever sneaked a peek at the ending of a book before you declared it readable? I’ve never even been tempted to do that. Honestly, I like surprises too much. I mean, I’m the kind of girl who sets her iTunes on shuffle because the normal playlist is too predictable. But there is one story that I wish I could flip ahead a few pages, and that’s the story of my life. But while I can’t fast-forward to the ending, I can read it backwards ~ which is what I’ve been doing the past couple of nights.
It’s amazing what you can find while reading old journal entries. Life looks so different in hindsight. Take the scene where I’m lamenting that I may be doomed to be a loner for the rest of my life. It was a legitimate concern then, but reading it now makes me laugh because I realize that God seriously must have been shaking His head and saying, “Oh Rebekah, you know those two guys you briefly mentioned in that second paragraph? …Yeah.”
Because what I didn’t know on that desperate day was that I had just made initial contact with two people who would soon become some of my dearest friends. But now, here I am, marking the corners of my journal pages with stars and little notes that say, “Remember this day.”
Why? Because I know that, eventually, I’m going to have more of those moments where I can’t see any good in my present situation. I’m going to have more days when I question the way God is working in my life. There are going to be more journal entries riddled with the same frustration that plagues the pages of my past. And if I can just look back and remember the good that came of those seemingly hopeless days, maybe I’ll find the courage to face the unknowns of tomorrow.
If your mind is full of questions to which you feel you’ll never find the answers, I want to encourage you to write them down. Remember this day. Because one day, you’ll be able to read your story backwards. One day, you’ll be able to look back with new eyes and see the things you missed while consumed with the moment. And one day, you’re going to look back and marvel at the wonder of it all.
Oh yes, you’ll want to remember this day.